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I don't want to pull off a Bukowski.

He was such an unhappy man
that Bukowski.

He had nothing but his
                               women
                                        and
                                            beer.
(He has me beat there)

He saw the worst in
  everyone.

He loved nothing but his
  type writer.

He only found serenity within his
                                            words
                                                  and
                                                     scribbles.
(We're equal there)

He was such an unhappy man
that Bukowski.

His misery and tribulations
lead to writing all his tiny miracles
and
that's
so
sad.

And in those tiny miracles
he sounded
more
and
more
mad.

Mad man.
            Honest man.
                             Drunk man.
                                           Wretched man.
All true.

Spending eternity on a bar stool
clothes covered in shit
mind in other things
reeking of cheap booze
                                 and
                                     cheaper perfume.

He didn't see beauty
in
anything.

The only person he liked
was an 8 year old
who once pointed out that
the ocean was
                  very
                      ugly.

He dubbed that kid a genius.
I'm worried he'd call me a genius too..
the next time we meet.

I meet him everyday actually
He's always cynical
with nothing but talk of
fucking,
drinking,
more fucking
and horses.

I didn't mind his smell.

Sometimes
he'd suddenly stop babbeling away
about the 4th horse.

He'd tug my sleeve and point
at the man who just
entered the bar
and ordered the cheapest booze.

"He's gonna die you know." He said
in that raspy brittle voice of his.

"Mhmmm...
He's gonna die tonight
when he finishes
his tenth beer.

He's gonna pick a fight
with the biggest motherfucker
here
and tell him that he still likes to suck on his
mom's titty.

He's gonna fight the good fight
but he's gonna lose.

That's the story of his life
                                  failures
                                          atop
                                              more
                                                  failures.

And when he comes to it he's gonna order that
tenth beer.
He's gonna crawl out of here
to his shithole apartment.
He's gonna pick up the phone
pick up his phonebook
and dial all his friends still in town to tell them it's his
birthday.

And they'll just hang up on his face.

He's gonna die when he comprehends
that
     nobody
              cares;
that
    nobody
             understands.

That all he ever did would never amount to
much.

He's gonna die in his bed with the tenth beer
smearing his bleached sheets.
"

I cringed.
I stared at the man longer
                                    and
                                        harder
attempting to capture a snapshot of his features.
I should go there I though.
I should go and ask him for his name.
His job.
His age.
His loved one's name,
and if he had a pet.

I should stop him from buying that
tenth beer.

He turned just as I managed to gather the will to go to
him.

He was Bukowski.


                                            I don't want to pull off a Bukowski.


That Bukowski was such an
unhappy man.

The more miserable he got
the more tiny mircales
he tardily
penned.

The more lonesome he was
the more women
he vacuously
fucked...
secretly wishing that they'd
be there in
the
morning.

None of them
did.

The more failures he encountered
the more beer
he rapidily
downed...
openly stating that the booze
would warm his shriveled body
when none of the women
                                  could
                                        heat
                                              it
                                               up.


                                          I don't want to pull off a Bukowski.



That Bukowski was such an
unhappy man.

He seemingly gave up on
everything
even his tombstone read
                                   "Don't Try."

But he did.
he survived
for 74 years.
Even when he couldnt talk of
fucking,
drinking,
more fucking
and horses.

I don't know how he did it.
I guess staring at those words he wrote
through the years
did him good.

Art made everything more bearable
and in Bukowski's case...
I think the music helped too
He was quite fond of that Tchaikovsky.

So I press play
and listen to symphony #5.

Glorious.

I too now am staring at the words I wrote
through the years.
From failed loved poems
when I was 13yrs old
                                to
                                  this.

But more importantly.
I'm staring at the words Bukowski wrote
through the years.

What he did and what I am doing
might actually amount to something
mine's a tiny speck in comparison.
but it's something...



If Bukowski with all his unhappiness
could survive
                  then
                        I
                        can
                            too.


                                           I want to pull off a Bukowski.
EDIT: Me reading this, if your interested in hearing flu ridden moe that is. I sound so sick and nasal it's hilarious and my imitation Bukowski is so wrong and delightfulyl retarded:

[link]



This is rather long.
This is probabily in the wrong section.
This is probabily typed out all wrong.
This most certainly contains the most bloody use of the english language to this date.

But I really dont care.

I've been walking for close to 5 hours now, and I just got back. Round 8:30 am round these parts. I think a few people think I'm mad, talkign and yelling out loud debating with myself.

I was walking, talking, taking shots and listening to everything. From Four Tet to DJ Shadow. From Eric Dolphy to Bukowski.

Bukowski. Bukowski. Bukowski.

This is a ramble. This is pointless. But I managing to get it out. I think that's good. I'm writing this as I go along. As I recorded it on my cassette while walking. I'm jut going to write just as I spoke it. Maybe I'll upload a clip of me reading this. Lien was right. Spoken word needs to be heard, nto read. Whats the point of it being spoken if you couldnt hear the writer's voice carried through the air waves?

I've never written something as honest as this.
I've never written something as long as this.

But I think it's the best thing my feeble mind has ever conjured up.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconashellessmind:
ashellessmind Featured By Owner Sep 22, 2012
Remember this?
Reply
:iconthe-chemical-actor:
the-chemical-actor Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2010
I hate peotry. When I originally started reading bukowski I thought he was only a novelist, then I saw his poetry and thought it was pretty good. This is the only other poem that I've ever read and liked.
congratz.
Reply
:iconchuckiebobphil:
chuckiebobphil Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2010  Professional Artist
I absolutely love it
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2010  Hobbyist Photographer
<3
Reply
:iconchuckiebobphil:
chuckiebobphil Featured By Owner Feb 17, 2010  Professional Artist
It was way good. I think you'd like my Bukowski'ish poem Ode to Bukowski.
Reply
:icontruthiseek:
truthiseek Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2009
This, despite the few inaccuracies, is one of the best poems I've read here on DA.
Great tribute to a great artist (and beer-drinker).
Reply
:iconabstracteyeview:
abstracteyeview Featured By Owner Nov 4, 2008
Fucking great. I love this poem. Bukowski is my favorite poet, by the way, so I'm obviously biased. Good job, man.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Nov 8, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
thanks alot mate =]
Reply
:iconperverse-pleasure:
perverse-pleasure Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2008   Writer
this is the soul of bukowski mixed with bruce e k

moe, this is so absolutely gut wrenching. i hate you for writing this, it's so fucking i sad, i feel really horrible now. =[
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2008  Hobbyist Photographer
funny enough ive yet to write anythign that didnt me feel even worse than before
Reply
:iconthreeofnine:
Threeofnine Featured By Owner Apr 7, 2008
Amazing. "Genius" is one of my favorites of his, next tmaing on his gravestone (look down).
Reply
:iconmisplaced-karma:
Misplaced-Karma Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2007
how'd I miss this one?
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2007  Hobbyist Photographer
indeed, how could you miss out on my first gushing out in sheer bukowski fanboy-ism? how could you?!
Reply
:iconlauralaloka:
lauralaloka Featured By Owner Nov 9, 2007
"...tiny miracles..."

Absolute, undiluted truth.

Love to you, comrade.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2007  Hobbyist Photographer
thanks mate :)
Reply
:iconfucken-emmshelle:
fucken-emmshelle Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2007   Writer
very very good.
bukowski is a hero of mine. and you illustrated him perfectly. most definitely going on the faves.
Reply
:iconfucken-emmshelle:
fucken-emmshelle Featured By Owner Jul 7, 2007   Writer
very very good.
bukowski is a hero of mine. and you illustrated him perfectly. most definitely going on the faves.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2007  Hobbyist Photographer
as he is to me. Bastard keeps saving my life every day with his words :)
glad you enjoyed it, it's my most fav piece, and im even more glad to see mroe Chinaski fans
Reply
:iconckwarwick:
CKWarwick Featured By Owner May 16, 2007
R.I.P. Hank
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner May 16, 2007  Hobbyist Photographer
id do anything fto go back in time to buy him a beer. bless his soul.
Reply
:iconckwarwick:
CKWarwick Featured By Owner May 16, 2007
I'd say the good die young, but he lived surprisingly long for his lifestyle. There's a shot of Chinaski in all of us.
Reply
:iconthe-sickly-word:
The-Sickly-Word Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2006   Writer
very good poem, I like it alot.

Just one insignificant gripe (but no fault on your part), is what you said about his tombstone, it does read "don't try", but his last wife explains (on the DVD Born into this) that it means, "Don't try, because you'll spend your whole life trying and never doing, just do"..... or something to that effect.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Oct 27, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
I did discover that a while after writing this, and it really made me see Hank in a new light. I have plans to write a new pom just based on that fact.

I'm glad you enjoyed it, it's certainly my most fav piece that I've written so far, and certainly the most I invested my self both mentally and physically. Thank you very much :)
Reply
:iconashellessmind:
ashellessmind Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2006
I changed my mind, I still like it, but the first half is much more articulate (and quite a bit better) than the first half. It looks like you were drinking while you wrote this and by the end you were a little tipsy.

You should edit it, at least for the spelling errors, or I'm taking it out of my favorites
(I have like 60 favorites, dude. I'm very very picky. You should be honored that three of your pieces are in there.)
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Aug 16, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
:salute. Fixed all the typos + grammer errors. I realise now that the transation is a bit off. I guess it was becuase I intially started it out on very solemn note, but then suddenly made it more hopeful. I'm going to try and fix it up a bit. Are there any specific bits that you think need drastic changes? or just try to work on making the flow a bit smoother?

and trust me ate, I am honored :ahoy:
Reply
:iconashellessmind:
ashellessmind Featured By Owner Aug 16, 2006
It goes generally downhill after the bit in italics with bukowski talking about the man who turns out to be bukowski again (bukowski in all of us?) -- That was the best part of the poem, and everything up to it doesn't live up to it. You shouldn't have too much falling and rising action in a poem. It should be mostly rising action, and then a quick drop to get your point across, at least, I'd think for a poem like this, it would go well.
I'd work on making the second half a bit more concise, and not so repetitive.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
Now that you've pointed it out I realyl do feel it brought things down a bit. I'm going to make a weekend out fixing this. I'll pass it by you on a note once I feel I fixed it up a bit.
Reply
:iconashellessmind:
ashellessmind Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2006
that'd be cool. I'll be waiting for it.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
Okay, I had a very hard time tryign to edit and change the wording. I guess the reason there is such a sharp contrast between the 1st half and 2nd is that I moved from talking about Bukowski to his impact on me.

However, I did obliterate a good portion of the 2nd part. The bit directly after bukowski starts talking about himself and till I ended up rammbling on about his smile for 4-5 stanzas (dear lord that bit was aweful). I think that portion really ruined the pace and flow of the piece.

do you think it's any better now? I still plan to try and fix the 2nd portion, so this isnt my final attempt.
Reply
:iconashellessmind:
ashellessmind Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2006
It goes much quicker now, and it doesn't drag the point into the mud. Still, you could edit it, but the unecessary repetition, which was my main problem with the piece, is gone. You make a point now, and you dont ruin your point with too much needless vomit.

Just remember though, as your poems reach into the thousands you will realize you created nothing.
and bukowski will be there to laugh at you.
Reply
:iconevenless:
evenless Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006   Writer
Certainly your best poem ever. I'm enjoying your poems more and more, moe, which means either that A) You're getting better, B) I'm getting back into poetry for real, or C) both. Either option is thrilling, and whatever it turns out to be, I have you to thank.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
Your words mean alot mate.

When may I ask will you grace us with some of your work?
Reply
:iconevenless:
evenless Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006   Writer
When I either crank out something that can compare to yours without looking like utter hogwash, that's when. Or when I give up, whichever's sooner. XD
Reply
:iconevenless:
evenless Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006   Writer
Know what? Fuck image, I'll post an old one right now to get me started. Nothing like your old work crudding up your Gallery to motivate you to improve and post better ones, eh?
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
Indeed my good man XD . Now post post post
Reply
:iconsunshineandgasoline:
sunshineandgasoline Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006
Wow! That was cool. You actually managed to keep my intrest throughout that long piece. XD

Also liked that you managed to put some light in the dark at the end, because it was a rather negative piece. I hope you get more happiness in life than him tho.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
I'll be happier if you stick to your diet >[
Reply
:iconcherryblosssom:
cherryblosssom Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006
and yeah, you can survive too.. i've read your poem several times, it sounds so deep, so desperate and sad.. you're so empathetic with this man!! it's unbelievable... and at the end you're so hopeful.. wish you only luck, Moejo :blowkiss:
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
Your words mean so much. Honest they do. I'm glad I'm a place filled with such dazzling souls like you :heart:
Reply
:iconpink-lotus:
Pink-Lotus Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006
Oh fucking hell that was touching, I wanted to cry.

Your voice and the emotion and the layout just gives it the completely depressing mood. I have to say this is your best piece you've ever created. I say you have to show Malika this, otherwise I will, but I am so impressed that you have come up with such a great piece.

I cannot find any more words to describe this except that I will use the word 'fucking' to excel the greatness.

Fucking classic.

I love this.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
I adore you
and your big glasses
and the leaf crown you wore on your head
and your O RLY? ava

:heart:
Reply
:iconpink-lotus:
Pink-Lotus Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2006
That's very strange. I have faved this and it doesn't show up in my list. Maybe because it's mature or something... xD
Reply
:iconmoridin-x:
Moridin-X Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006
That was awesome moemoe

I'd definately agree that its one of, if not your best.
Reply
:iconcherryblosssom:
cherryblosssom Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006
read your poem, listened to your voice... you're a lovely talented young man :heart:
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
:blush:
Reply
:iconashellessmind:
ashellessmind Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2006
I dont understand the bit about horses.
Everything else was great.
Its wonderfully imperfect. For once, I dont want you to edit it.

Stream of consciousness at its best.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
cheery beat me too it. Im glad you liked it mate =]
Reply
:iconcherryblosssom:
cherryblosssom Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006
Bukowski had a thing for horse racing betting :D
Reply
:iconninjanerd:
ninjanerd Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2006
Fucking magical.
Reply
:iconmoejo:
moejo Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2006  Hobbyist Photographer
ZACHO singed up just to say that. love you ;_;
Reply
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June 4, 2006
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